One thing that stands out for me is the way the word "know" is used. In this context, "knowing" our breath doesn’t mean thinking about it, analyzing it, or even labeling it. "Knowing" the breath is a clear and wordless knowing that comes through joining our awareness to our breath. We know the quality of our breath just by staying connected to it and feeling it, or sensing it, from the inside. When we label the type of breath we are having, we have to separate from our immediate breath in order to call up words. Ven. Gunaratana said, "You can only label something after it is already past." "Labeling takes time – time for the thought to arise...time to think of words to conceptualize what you are aware of...." Because of this, "You cannot label something while it is happening." Mindfulness "helps you to eliminate intermediaries such as concepts and words."

Much of the time, way too much, we inhabit something like a parallel universe – there is the totality of the world of which we are a part where we can experience things directly, beyond our thoughts and judgments. And then there is our own private, mental world, where most of the time, we churn out a commentary on what we are experiencing and how we feel about it, as if we didn’t already know. The story of our experience often feels more real than the original experience itself.

In Zen meditation, we don’t focus on the breath to the exclusion of everything else. The primary focus may be the breath; but at the same time, our field of awareness may be wide and inclusive so it includes the presence and sensations of the whole body, such as emotions, sounds, smells, touch, pain and so on. We practice with the breath by allowing ourselves to breathe naturally through the nose while noticing that we are breathing, and there’s no right or wrong way to breathe. Awareness of the breath is a way to experience this moment of life, so we don’t need to control the breath or interfere with it in any way. Whatever breath you find, simply allow your breath to be, and join your attention to that breath.

Zen emphasizes getting to know who we are, getting to know the nature of our mind and the nature of reality, by being present with the detail of our experience and accepting it, rather than trying to change or improve the way we are. Being aware of the breath, being intimate with breathing, without trying to control it, is similar to the way we practice with our mind in zazen. In practice we get to know our mind, including emotions and their processes, without trying to control them or change them. But awareness is essential; awareness is the transforming agent. This awareness is non-interfering and non-judgmental.

The writer, Anne Cushman, in talking about practicing awareness of the breath said, "Meditation, for me, had always been a cerebral experience, with "me" sitting firmly in my own head, observing my breath and body (that itchy nostril! that stabbing knee!) like a theater critic reviewing a particularly maddening play. But now, for the first time, I was feeling my own body from the inside, swimming in a swirling stream of sensations. After years of trying to watch my breath, finally I was being it." I think many of us have the experience of watching our selves or observing our experience, as if we were looking through a telescope at something separate. So, we become an objective observer and turn our experience into an object. But, instead of analyzing or labeling, try to settle into your body and breath in a more intimate, direct way. Sometimes I think of this as letting awareness melt into my body through my muscles, the way butter melts into and saturates warm toast.

Counting the breath is one way to practice awareness of breathing which is done by placing one count with each exhalation. Suzuki Roshi said, "To count means.... To devote yourself to practice with your mind and body. But it is easier to say, ‘count your breaths,’.... Even though you lose your count sometimes, it is all right. But how you count is with every part of your body: with your mudra, with your breath, with your mind.... your mind is everywhere: with every part of your body. This is how you count your breaths. Another time, he said, "To count each breath is to breathe with our whole mind and body. We count each number with the power of the whole universe"

If you feel discouraged about your ability to stay with your breath or with the counting, remember the counting is just an aid – there is nothing magic about being able to count to ten. Instead of trying to develop awareness of ten breaths or trying to be aware of your breathing for forty minutes, it may be more helpful to resolve just to stay with this one breath from beginning to end. Actually, there is nothing else. In zazen, everything outside this breath is imaginary.

Suzuki Roshi said, "Don’t count your breaths just to avoid your thinking mind but to take the best care of your breathing. If you are very kind with your breathing, one breath after another, you will have a refreshed, warm feeling in your zazen. When you have a warm feeling for your body and your breath, then you can take care of your practice."